Date men and women from California, United States. There once was a lad, sharp of wit,
Red of hair, clean of mind, body fit.
His life, though quite nice,
Was lacking in spice,
"To a woman," he thought, "I'll commit."
A story's best told from the start,
'Cause sometimes, well, that's the best part.
So now we'll digress,
Head for the midwest,
And weave a tale that begins from the heart.
A young couple, try though they might,
Were childless, so to end their plight,
To the home they did ride,
Upon going inside,
Spied the redhead, 'twas love at first sight.
An only child growing was he,
The hugs, love, and snuggles flowed freely.
He was encouraged and prodded,
Motivated and lauded,
"We want you to be all you can be!"
Years later, writing software for cars,
Often eschewing the bars,
He got little rest,
Did his studious best,
'Cause someday he'd send probes to the stars!
Quite well educated was he,
3 B.S., 2 M.S., Ph.D.
You'd think with that much,
Book learning and such,
He'd be a dullard, but he's not, wait and see!
At home he was hardly a slob,
A trait learned from his father, Bob.
Yes he put down the seat,
Though not retentively neat,
Better yet, you'll like this, "I've a job!"
His career seems nearly sci-fi.
Launching probes, off to Saturn they fly.
His research is exciting,
(Except paper writing,)
He’s a real rocket science kinda guy!
Then Hollywood summoned his name,
With the promise of fortune and fame.
His skills put to the test,
With increasing success,
"It's a HOBBY," or that's what he'd claim.
Then somebody got in their head,
“Your words would surely be read,”
So he said, “What the heck?”
Wrote books, blog, and a spec,
Turns out people DO care what he’s said.
Though exciting and filled with rewards,
Life somehow still left him bored.
"I know! A wife!
Is what's needed this life,
And a family we'll both work towards.
He discovered the Match.com site,
And entered to find his Ms. Right.
He saw dozens of great ladies,
Names from Sharon to Sadie,
Thus, the limericks he started to write.
I'm from Mars, and I hear you're from Venus,
Perhaps soon naught will e'er come between us."
And though most of the time,
Humble and sublime,
I'm big on...discretion in rhyme.
I sure hope you like animals too.
Do I live in a house or a zoo?
With a pack and a fluffle,
Feathers to ruffle,
And a mischief of Murinae too.
'Tis a challenging task, to be sure.
Finding a lass who's both sweet and demure.
So he put pen to paper,
And then, hours later,
The tale's end? That he left up to her.