Date women from United States / California / Simi Valley, 28 year old

Date single girl from California, United States. [cue music and lights]
Are you tired of dating women who are all wrong for you? Do you wish you could find a woman who interests you on many levels? Well I have the solution! INTRODUCING...ME! Simply use the keys in front of you to send me an email and you will discover renewed excitement about the hope of romance and the possibility that there is a REAL woman out there. Send it within the next 5 minutes and you'll also enjoy thought-provoking conversation, plenty of laughter, and as a special bonus…unexpectedly memorable experiences!
But WAIT...that's not all! ACT NOW and youРІР‚в„ўll receive not ONE, not TWO, but a lifetime supply of stomach butterflies!!!!
*Disclaimer: Individual results will vary; contents may settle during shipping.
[fade out music]
j/k! Guess IРІР‚в„ўve seen one too many infomercials. Some of you are probably thinking this guy is either totally LAME or has delusions of grandeur :p. That's okay, I'm ONLY looking to attract those who get it.
I am not looking for a fling (that's what bars are for)... While I'd like to find a meaningful connection with someone, if we meet and it turns into a great friendship, I would welcome that.
UPDATE 11/10: No more crazy men please! Apparently, hot men think I'll make an exception for them; and all I can say is... mmmm...okay, but only if you are on your meds!! :)
First Date
Something casual that doesn't involve us facing each other while chomping food (whomever decided that this is the most alluring way to begin a relationship was wrong ;))
First Date
i like being surprised