Date men and women from United States / California / Loomis, 30 year old

Date men and women from California, United States. Ello. I'm 30, single, tall, white with an Hispanic last name, pretty nerdy without the bonus of it being beneficial for a career. I would love have the ability to rip a computer apart and put it back together, but that isn't in the cards.
I'm shy, and an introvert, though I fake an extrovert real well in social occasions. It helps if someone asks a question I can tangent off of. I take a long time to warm up to strangers, and I hope being here may help that. Questions asked are a good ice breaker, and feel free to shoot me a line. I'm gregarious among friends, and quiet and stoic among strangers.
Sarcasm runs deep in my veins. Nothing gets the Bunsen burner going like a dry evisceration of a deserving party, such as the ubiquitous jackass or douchebag, and sometimes that party is me. I appreciate silence, but get me going on something and I'll chat for hours. Also my foot is well acquainted with my mouth at this point.
I don't know a thing about indie music, not a clue. I wish I did, as I find the short haired indie women quite attractive and fetching, but if the need arises, I will fake the shit out of it to try and survive an awkward conversation.
I read all the time, and I would label the amount somewhere between a "shitload" and a "fuckton". If you have a favorite book, I've either read it or know about it, or have read enough similar work to discuss it. BUT, if it is a book that no one else read except the five other members of your inner circle, known only to the most obscure and arcane book lords, then chances are I missed it.
I'm not outdoorsy, though I do enjoy nature, but I'm happier at a park or national forest than a hike looking for the City of Z. My good friend took me on a hike in Auburn, and though he found it an invigorating and existential experience I only remember that my ankles became bricks of pain and that I caught poison oak, discovering I'm highly allergic to it. He plans to take me to less deadly areas...I'm hoping he means the park. Also I've had asthma since I was a kid that seems set of by exercise or just being outside, pushing my activities to the urban indoor, hence my enjoyment of lifting in the gym, doing jiu jitsu, and discussions around coffee tables. It comes and goes, but don't expect me to be able to sprint for a long distance.
I'm not a big chatter, texter, emailer, or facebooker. I have all these things, of course; a citizen of the modern age must partake by necessity, but email with never replace conversation on phone.