Date men and women from United States / California / Elk Grove, 28 year old

Date a soulmate from California, United States. WANTED: Somebody to go back in time with me. This is not a joke. You'll get paid after we get back. Must bring your own weapons. Safety not guaranteed. I have only done this once before.
100 bonus points if you know where that's from.
All kidding aside, I'm a college graduate in criminal justice. Former police officer, but had to give up my dream prematurely. Currently a purchaser (that's right ladies, all I do is buy stuff all day) and while it's not the most exciting job in the world, it pays well and it does have the major plus of not having to report to anybody but the boss himself.
My passion is actually art and i would love to get back to dabbling with it (as a hobby not profession.)
I'm sort of a mixed bag. I'll be fairly reserved and level-headed for the most part, but many people who truly know me on a personal level feel I'm one of the funniest guys to be around. You will have to be on guard when you're around me, and hopefully you can dish some back. Yes I'm at that point in my life where I feel I need to be growing up, settling down, getting that house, going through the grind, etc, but there's also a place for humor and light-halfheartedness
In terms of activities I enjoy going to the range (wish I had more time and $$$) and playing basketball. And although I hate running, I really want to get back into it. I stopped after the academy and I totally regret it.
Just purchased my first house and I'm having fun and pulling out my hair while attempting to spruce it up. Murphy's law is in full effect with this place. That's part of the reason why I'm on this site. I need to have an outside power rip me away from spending every waking minute on this project.