Date men from United States / Alabama / Calera, 29 year old

Date a soulmate from Alabama, United States. Wait! Before you read on, I want you to do something for me. Look into the circle. -O- Now, don't move your eyes until you're done reading my profile. Now, here's the cool part. If you can do it, then you have to marry me.
Oh, I see how it is. You know what? I don't wanna marry you anyway. Clearly you're not very good at following instructions, which means I would be stuck doing all the cooking, cleaning, laundry...and it's just not in me to be the perfect man. :)
I can, however, cook a mean ass hamburger, put my toys away, and do my own laundry.
A few other things...
- I take my shoes off without untying them.
- I'm a master at the claw game.
- I'm left-handed, but im always right. :P
- Looking at the sun makes me sneeze.
- I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a spatula and a toaster oven.
- I can bake 30 minute brownies in 20 minutes flat.
- I watch the movie before I read the book....actually, I don't read the book at all.
- I order my steak medium-rare...but I want to go to one of Gordon Ramsay's restaurants, order a rare steak, and scream, "It's RAW!"
- I'm a stellar hugger and a world class cuddler. That one is true.
- I shower daily. ZEST-FULLY CLEAN!
- I wear socks that match...unless the dryer decides to pull a magic trick, in which I have a sock I no longer wear.
- Sushi is my favorite food group.
- Halloween, St. Patrick's Day, & New Years are my favorite holidays.
- I love thunderstorms.
- Finally, when I retire I want to buy a boat, sail the Caribbean, make my own rum, and bootleg it.
I like stand-up comedy, hazelnut creamer, totino's hamburger pizzas, people with a sense of humor, my slinky, raspberry creamsicles, smelling new books, wearing collared shirts and rolling the sleeves up, sporting events, empathy, waffles, classic rock concerts, optimism, playing poker, hibachi grills, and girls that wear cowboy boots.
I dislike monotone voices, bananas, ignorance, the smell of burnt popcorn, celery, lack of ambition, avocado, running out of ranch dressing, negative attitudes, an un-tuned guitar, drivers that wont let you merge, boring people, overcooked meat, and coming up with clever things to say in a dating service profile. :D