Date men from United States / Alabama / Daphne, 42 year old

Date someone special from Alabama, United States. I'm athletic and good looking, a hopeless romantic, I have a fantastic, rewarding job as a high-level professional and I have everything I want from lif... Bwaaaaahahaha I just can't go on like that and keep a straight face. I'm more like an unholy brew with the body of Homer Simpson, the contemptuous glare of Ron Swanson, the well-heeled bitterness of Red Forman, the irreverent wit of Hawkeye Pierce, the biting sarcasm of Joel McHale, the fluffy, tender spite of Gregory House, the trendy intellect of Matt Smith, the unkempt, disheveled look of either the tousled-hair guy from Top Gear or Arthur Dent and the unwelcoming scowl of James Mason.
I have a job that, while not fashionable or in any way interesting, is stable and dependable, my own place, and a healthy sense of contempt for most of the world. Like my tagline says, I'm totally unimpressed with life so far. I like intelligent conversation, I can cook and wash up after myself and I practice proper spelling and grammar - I know the difference between their, there and they're, and your, you're and yore. I like to think I'm an optimist, though I'm far too jaded and bitter for that to be wholly practical. I'm actually a washed-up old punker who's put up my spikes and trench in exchange for Hawaiian shirts, knickers and hikers. I love to tinker and I can while away days at a time taking things down to bits and I'm fascinated to no end with what makes things work. I have a sarcastic wit so sharp it peels the plaster from the walls, and I spend much of my day rolling my eyes at the sheer idiocy of the world. I absolutely love to read anything I can get my hands on - books, newspapers, scientific journals, trifolds from racks, bits pinned to corkboards, whatever. I watch a fair bit of telly (no cable or sat - just old-fashioned rabbit ears and the interwebs), but I absolutely detest most 'reality' programmes. I'd much rather watch a science documentary any day than let my mind go to mush over who's boffing who on what Polynesian paradise island. So, that's me.
I'm looking for someone decently educated and well-spoken with perhaps a slightly less cynical view of the world than mine. I have no issues whatsoever if you're more highly educated than myself, or if you've got a better job, or if you've seen more of the world. Or if you've none of that. People of all kinds fascinate me, and I can usually peg someone within 30 seconds - In my line of work, that ability is crucial if not critical. I've not got any prescient abilities or anything, just years of experience. Likewise, don't be put off if you think I sound pompous or arrogant on here. I am absolutely not, I just tend to be somewhat better at writing than speaking. Stupid basal ganglion or some damn thing like that.
For now I'm on a free spot on here, more on that in a bit. I've been out of the so-called dating scene for some twenty years, seen the adverts on the telly so I just wanted to see what this was all about. I like that I can learn things without having to go through all the messy pleasantries and awkward conversation, and see what people are like. Or what they say they're like - I'm not so much a noob that I trust anyone automatically ever, especially online. I'm a bit of a cynical bloke, so please don't be offended if I don't accept anything as read. I don't expect anyone to do the same for me.
As for why I'm on here gratis; I'm a bit - well, cheap sounds harsh but I can't come up with any way to put it that sounds less so. Also, I'm in the middle of the big D and really don't want anyone to get pulled into the middle of it. That wouldn't be fair, and if I do find that I fancy someone, I'd rather be free and clear before I start another chapter. I'm sure anyone would agree that's the decent way to do it. So if you're completely mental and actually find me interesting, don't be put off if I don't respond right away. It may be some time before I'm ready - legally and mentally - to have a go at this.

Meet single man from Alabama, United States. I want to find some one who can make me laugh and some one who can carry on a conversation.Some one that I can be at home with and there is no dull time.we can just watch tv and be at ease with each other.

Date a soulmate from Alabama, United States. I'm have no time for deceit and b.s., I am looking for the woman that is comfortable with herself, being honest and straight forward and saying what they mean. I only ask for honesty and communication. I am apositive and strong man and I won't settle, for fake. I wish you all luck in your search, may you all find happiness. If you are not real and honest dont waste my time. I am a father of an amazing son, and the son of an amazing father and mother! I am looking for a lady that doesnt seem to exist in this world. She must be smart and funny, clever and thoughtful, adventurous, affctionte,sexy and passionate, beautiful inside and out! A real person sans the drama and games! A great comunicator, and my best friend. A woman that makes me want to be the best man I can for her. She to be my queen and I her king! I believe a smile and a hug can make the wrong of a bad day fade away, and a good kiss makes life a treasure!!

Meet a man from Alabama, United States. Hi my name is Jerry . Ive worked in the trades my untire life. But now im in Alabama workn on a friends house. Gonna be here a while. An seein if I can make a friend... Not sure wat to say eccept that im outgoing . Love adrenalin... I like outdoors, skydiving, movies, cooking, goin out to eat, an a few other things.. Actually doin this on my phone an typn on this thing is a chore...lol. If you want to know more..hit me up..lol